Bang by E. K. Blair

Author:E. K. Blair [Blair, E. K.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Barnesnoble:
Goodreads: 21459365
Publisher: E.K. Blair LLC
Published: 2014-05-17T16:00:00+00:00

WAKING UP IN Declan’s bed the following day was peaceful. Peaceful in every morbid way. His hands were all over me while his face made its home between my legs before he pulled me on top of his lap. He had my arms crossed behind my back while he held each of my hands, locking my arms from moving as I fucked him. And again, he held my hands while I came. If I’m being honest, I feel like I need that support from him, because what he makes me feel during sex is sheer torment and anxiety. I don’t want sex to feel good. It shouldn’t feel good. But he doesn’t give me any other choice, so I lied to him, telling him that Clara was going to be at my place and that I needed to be there so she wouldn’t worry or question my whereabouts. I just needed to get away from him.

As soon as I get home, I take a scalding hot shower, washing every part of me, but nothing can clean me the way Pike can. I feel myself breaking and stop the fight long enough to let it out. Never in my life have I ever wanted to feel what Declan makes me feel. As images from last night and this morning run through my head, the tears surface as my stomach convulses in bubbles of putrid disgust. Unable to hold it down, I quickly step out of the shower, fall to my knees over the toilet, and vomit uncontrollably. It’s a painful mixture of saliva, puke, and tears. Visions of Declan, Carl, leather, flesh, cum, that filthy mattress, the smell of that basement, the smell of Declan, my vicious hate for Bennett, my loneliness of missing Pike, my father’s headstone. Everything consumes me. I hear it, smell it, see it, feel it, and then another forceful expulsion barrels its way up my throat and into the toilet.

In this moment, I hate my life. I hate everything about this shithole of a life I so desperately want to free myself from. Sobs achingly rip out of me, and as I fall back onto the cold slate floor, I lie there, wet and naked, the smell of my vomit filling the room. And when I close my eyes, I see my dad.

“Princess, what are you doing?” he mumbles in a sleepy voice as I crawl under the covers with him.

“I’m scared.”

He helps me pull the blanket over myself and then cuddles me in his arms, saying, “Nothing will ever hurt you. I’ll always protect you. Now, tell me what scared you.”

“I can’t remember. I just woke up and I was scared.”

“Bad dream?”

I nod my head against his chest and snuggle underneath the covers of his bed, asking, “Can I sleep with you tonight, Daddy?”

“You don’t want to go back to your own bed?”

“No. I just want you.”

His large arms band around me tighter. “How can I say no to that?” he says and then kisses my forehead, the stubble on his face pricking my skin, causing me to giggle.

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